Earlier I mentioned something about acquiring a "virtual stripper". Now, the virtual stripper mission statement proclaims that you can type whatever command you want into a little white box underneath the virtual stripper and she will understand and perform the command. Awesome, I know. Only I type all sorts of things into the white box, even basic things like "stand", "dance", "show me your left breast", and all the virtual stripper does is look out of her little porn box screen and shake her head, mouthing the words "i don't understand you" as if she can't hear me. And she can't hear me but she can't speak either, and apparently she can't sit or understand the word g-string. She's the worst stripper ever and I'm pretty sure she's slowing down my computer. I'll name her Lucy Valentine.
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